The Ants are Marching

I like critters as well as the next guy. When our kids were growing up we had multiple dogs cats rabbits gerbils guinea pigs (UGH all they did was eat and poop with emphasis on the poop) hamsters parakeets silvercrested cocateels frogs lizards snakes (that dennis brought home from work in his pocket) Joey the burmese python or whatever he was was Doug's and Doug's alone. spiders (one trantula for only a day), silk moths (until Brenda put them in the freezer to hibernate instead of putting them in the fridge ) and snails. The hamsters and the snake from work were the worst . When they escaped their cages I thanked God that they were gone and then did a gratitude reversal when , in the middle of the night I stepped on one of them.

Back to liking critters. The Day Care kids and I are all pro critter. We watch WONDER PETS, DORA and GO DIEGO GO all shows focused on saving critterdom. Just yesterday I "BUGA BUGAed" along with Jacob as we helped Dora help a Bugs Buga critter with finding a lost cookie. BUT !!!! I call a halt to ANTS !!!

California has been in the midst of an extended drought. Critters of all sizes (humans included) have had to adapt to the diminished supply of liquid from the sky. Husbands seem to have latched on to the idea that showering with their wives or girlfriends is a GREAT water saving idea, This is according to water conservation specialists that I surveyed

THEN the RAINS came ! This past weekend we had almost 6 inches of rain. Dennis and I stayed home and slept in and generally relaxed. The ANTS however, having adapted to drought conditions were NOT happy. They sought the dryness and floor crumbs (a veritable smorgesboard) of our Montrose abode.

I awoke that Saturday am to a real life MTV type version of the song "THE ANTS ARE MARCHING" The floor was undulating with waves of them. For those more adventuresome they found another route, From our back door they marched up the wall around the window over the counter across the washing machine and onto the sink where they settled in on the sink sponge.

Mari you were right ! The kitchen sponge is NOT something you want to use to CLEAN anything. But it is a veritable CLUB MED for ants,,Warm Wet and all the food debris they could ever want to eat.

I whipped out the Lysol and Bleach and after about an hour Dennis took me out to Brunch. I now have a LOVE/Hate relationship going with those ants. Did I mention that I called ROOMBA my faithful robotic vacuum cleaner in to help with the ocean of ants on the floor? Roomba did an outstanding job, but I then had the problem of what to do with a ROOMBA full of live ants. Ignoring the dismal results of Dennis's failed mouse relocation program, I released the critters outside.

Sunday brought a second storm and a second wave of soggy tiny critters. who were obviously turned off by my hygenic counters, floor and the absence of kitchen sponge, They decided to settle in on the gourmet fare of our trash can. I discovered them when without looking I tossed a paper towel into the can and withdrew my hand wearing a creapy crawly glove of ants.

The SUN came out on Monday and the ants seemed to have retreated to bail out their own residences outside (or at least I hoped so) But alas, a third storm came thru. that night. I awoke with trepidation. Would my kitchen floor undulate with their masses,, Would I end up with a pair of living sox as I atempted to make coffee? No more sponges so no worry there! AHHH ! ! Home Free !! That was my feeling until I went to the microwave to warm up my cup of coffee which had cooled off while I checked out corners and cupboards in case the critters had gotten sneaky. THERE THEY WERE !! IN THE MICROWAVE !!! They had taken it over (I'm not that great a cleaner) My first thought was ROOMBA. He wouldn't fit into the microwave. So again I reached for the Lysol and bleach

Dennis has a board meeting and I'm preparing cookies for the meeting snack. I am putting them in ziplock bags and then into the fridge. If the ants get to them I surrrender. I'll pitch a tent at the nearest McDonalds that has a A health Dept. Rating. The "A" means NO ANTS doesn't it???